Drowning by backbaygirl

Hi backbaygirl, I found your short story intriguing and with further character development there is a basis of a good novel. I would have Cody shown as a hero at first, maybe saving her from getting mugged on her way home. So not only has he saved her from herself but also from thugs. Cheers, martin

This shows promise, perhaps a little more flow in the sentences so that they're not so short, but the characters appear interesting and the overall story is strong. Keep going and well done backbabygirl.